30 May 2007

The Emotional Side Of Motherhood


I have always been an emotional person, I wear my heart on my sleeve and always have done. Becoming a mother has raised my emotional quotient to an all new level that even has me shaking my head at my pathetic-ness.

I dropped Lily off this morning for school and as I walked back to my car I realised this was her last day as a "pre-k cutie" and no sooner had that thought entered my head the tears started flowing. I just cannot believe that the next time I walk into her school I will be taking her to Kindergarten. I composed myself and drove home with a sad face. I came home and pondered my little girl and how big she is now and just how incredibly wonderful she is.

I thought when I first became her mummy that I wanted her to stay little forever. She was so ridiculously cute and impish. I loved the way she talked and the way that she couldn't say the letter "s" and used "f" instead so that her life was filled with fiders and focks (spiders and socks) the way she called us Mummio and Daddio. The first time she met my father and his wife it was love at first sight and she refused to say grandpa cos he was her daddy too and I would tell her that it was her Grandpa and she would say, NO, my daddy too. And my father thought it was great and that she was just so smart.

I have now realised that I love every stage and every age. Each passing month just brings out more of her personality and curiosity. Tonight out of the clear blue sky she asked me if you can see people when they go to heaven if you are holding their hand. I wasn't quite sure what she meant at first but then I understood and we chatted about going to heaven and how the whole deal works. I can see her mind working when we are out and about and then out pop the questions. She is a sponge and so very funny and smart. (yes, I realise I say this a lot but she truly is, just ask anyone in our family!)

So as I sit here reminiscing the younger Lily years I have to smile because even though she is getting big and independent she will always be mine. And when she gets married she will still live at home with us. I know this cos she told us the other day. She added that she might get the house next door but she would come and visit and we could go there too!

She turns five in a few days and I am NOT ready for that but I don't suppose I can do much about it so I will put on my game face and deal with it.

14 comments:

PIPO said...

I love this post. You've got a slice of heaven right there growing up in your house. No matter what age Lily is, you're going to love it because you'll be in the moment with her :0)

Steffie B. said...

You are such a wonderful Mum and you have a wonderful family. It is hard to see them grow up, but "you" are always Mum! ;)

M and M said...

I love that Lily wants to live with you when she get married! That is soooo sweet!!

Thanks for sharing!

Life with JJ, Starr and Spice said...

Thanks for sharing your thoughts as your sweet daughter enters this new stage in her life. It will only get sweeter and sweeter because you are her mummy and a great one at that. The proof is the amazing Lily!!

Beckyb said...

I totally agree - you love them little, you love them medium, you love them big!!! The joys of being a Mommy - and it's all good!!

Janet said...

OH, I am SOOOOO with you! I used to feel the same way. I just wanted them to stay babies forever. And now, their minds are opening up and they are becoming these amazing personalites that I am also so astonished by, and ....I just love it! Don't get me wrong, I still LOVE babies! But I have grown to realize that all the stages are good stages! That was a GREAT POST!!!!

PS- I have always been a big ball of mush. Nothing has changed. I don't think it ever will.....:-)

Polar Bear said...

I am beginning to realize after following blogs for over a year that these little babies that we wait and wait and wait for don't stay little for very long. I can't believe how much they change in just one year.

Your Lily is a special gift. I am so glad you share her little moments with us.

I wonder what son-in-law will think about moving in with mother-in-law. :)

Dannye said...

and I totally agree with you....Lily is an amazing little girl, sweet, cute, funny, and amazingly smart!!

but i have one word of advice, as a non-parent, but one in waiting...remember those words you have written when Lil enters those teen-aged years!!! hehe

Buckeyes & Eggrolls said...

I know all to well the feelings you are having. They never change either. This year my "baby" is truly stepping into the "real world'. She has been at college for two years now but this summer will be the first that she doesn't come home. She has an apartment now and is going to stay there and work over the summer. I'm sooo very sad. It's a moment you wait for, your kids to be independant, but a moment you dread as well.

3D said...

From my experience with my nephews, seeing them get older makes you wish they would stay young forever but now that they are adults, they are these amazing people who I am so happy to know.

Each stage is the best!

Keep smilin!

Briana's Mom said...

I can't wait until I experience the emotional side of motherhood!

I love that she said she will live with you when she gets married. I think need to make her to put it in writing - LOL!

Nikki said...

I am also an extremely emotional creature, so I would be right there with you sobbing all the way home!
You have an amazing little girl there, and I think the years with her are only going to get better (if you can even IMAGINE that!)
What is her exact birth date? I knew it was near my Lily's (and mine and yours!)...

Roy and Lori said...

It's amazing how time
flies! It seems like
one day your children
are only babies and
before you know it
they are graduating
from school!
But yes.....No matter
how old they are they
always want their
mommy!!!!!!!!!

Andie said...

I can't believe that she thinks Jacob will let any man marry her!

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