school pictures

This post contains lots of sarcasm. It is me at my finest so if you do not care for sarcasm back away, quickly and QUIETLY. You have been warned.

5th grade, age 10. Forever to be known as the year of the broke arm

Kindergarten. Age 6. The year of the long legs

Twice a year the school does the obligatory photos and on those days the school, that has a mandatory uniform, allows the kids to wear whatever they want. Makes no sense to me either. A few weeks goes by and then they send home the photos and we get to throw our heads back and roar with laughter at the ridiculousness of the photos and then we raise our eyebrows and ask, what the hell was the photographer thinking? I love my girls to bits and always purchase a photo or two to mark the school year passing but seem to purchase less and less as the years go by. This year the package was $70. Are you freaking kidding me? For these crappy pictures, oh and lest you should think that was for both of the girls, WRONG that was per child.

So lets begin dissecting the photos shall we...its' jolly good fun.

 1. What the hell is with the camo background? I truly don't find it very becoming for little girls in dresses or in shorts for that matter.

2. Lily has no eyeballs. Well of course she does just not in the photo. Shouldn't the fauxtog have had her chin pointed up, just a tad?

3. Apparently he/she was more concerned with trying to hide her broken arm. (lily told me he sat her backwards and made her look over her shoulder until she refused) The arm is like the elephant in the room, accept it but the eyes, they would have been nice.

moving on

4. Perhaps Rosie smelled a little funny that morning. She didn't when she left the house but there must be a reason why he shot this picture from so far away? Look at the baseboard in Lil's photo and then is Ro's, notice the size difference?

5. This is picky but the stool is bigger than Rose. Should have used the cushion that the bigger kids used.

6. A generic, tuck in your shirts and fix your hair would have gone a long way. But that isn't really the fauxtogs job. Rosie looks like she just came dashing out of the loo.


Last year when I posted this I got a very snotty defensive comment from a school photographer. Don't worry lovey it's all in humour so puhlease don't get your knickers in a knot this year. I bet you are heads and shoulders about this bunch.

Gotta love em', they are seriously terrible.

Chalk and Cheese

It was picture day at the girls school a few weeks ago and as is the norm they were asked not to wear their uniforms to school that day.

I asked the girls to pick out their clothes the night before. Rosie took all of 4 seconds to choose her clothes and I was not at all surprised with what she chose, her favourite Halloween shirt and her black leggings. For a fleeting second I was going to talk her out of it but then I realised that 20 years from now when I look at the photo I will say, "Wow Rosie I can't believe you actually chose a dress for picture day that year", completely forgetting that I forced her into it. She isn't a girly girl so it makes no sense to dress her as one for a school picture.

Lily on the other hand disappeared into her walk in closet and was gone forever. Outfits were being tried on and discarded hand over fist. She finally chose something that she loves. Of course once the clothes were chosen she had to chose accessories and then decide how she would style her hair in the morning. By the time she had finished making all her decisions Rosie and I were rolling on the floor groaning in pain.

I understand that there isn't time to make sure that the kids all look smart in front of the camera it's just sit, smile, shoot, next. I always remind them to comb their hair and smile but that is all I can do. I don't expect much from the photos and they never disappoint.

My big girl all pulled together and smiling.

And then there is her little sister!!!

Now I have already mentioned that I don't expect much but really don't you think they could have told her she looked like she had been pulled through a hedge backwards. I literally laughed out loud when I saw her hair.

I also need to add that all the other girls in her class were in such fancy schmancy dresses. Hah!

A perfect depiction of Rose!

She loves this photo of her and I do too.