school pictures

This post contains lots of sarcasm. It is me at my finest so if you do not care for sarcasm back away, quickly and QUIETLY. You have been warned.

5th grade, age 10. Forever to be known as the year of the broke arm

Kindergarten. Age 6. The year of the long legs

Twice a year the school does the obligatory photos and on those days the school, that has a mandatory uniform, allows the kids to wear whatever they want. Makes no sense to me either. A few weeks goes by and then they send home the photos and we get to throw our heads back and roar with laughter at the ridiculousness of the photos and then we raise our eyebrows and ask, what the hell was the photographer thinking? I love my girls to bits and always purchase a photo or two to mark the school year passing but seem to purchase less and less as the years go by. This year the package was $70. Are you freaking kidding me? For these crappy pictures, oh and lest you should think that was for both of the girls, WRONG that was per child.

So lets begin dissecting the photos shall we...its' jolly good fun.

 1. What the hell is with the camo background? I truly don't find it very becoming for little girls in dresses or in shorts for that matter.

2. Lily has no eyeballs. Well of course she does just not in the photo. Shouldn't the fauxtog have had her chin pointed up, just a tad?

3. Apparently he/she was more concerned with trying to hide her broken arm. (lily told me he sat her backwards and made her look over her shoulder until she refused) The arm is like the elephant in the room, accept it but the eyes, they would have been nice.

moving on

4. Perhaps Rosie smelled a little funny that morning. She didn't when she left the house but there must be a reason why he shot this picture from so far away? Look at the baseboard in Lil's photo and then is Ro's, notice the size difference?

5. This is picky but the stool is bigger than Rose. Should have used the cushion that the bigger kids used.

6. A generic, tuck in your shirts and fix your hair would have gone a long way. But that isn't really the fauxtogs job. Rosie looks like she just came dashing out of the loo.


Last year when I posted this I got a very snotty defensive comment from a school photographer. Don't worry lovey it's all in humour so puhlease don't get your knickers in a knot this year. I bet you are heads and shoulders about this bunch.

Gotta love em', they are seriously terrible.