26 Oct 2012

Life lessons

I didn't realise until today just how sheltered our lives are. We don't mingle with people other than our kind of people. Today, yet again, I stepped outside of my comfort zone for the sake of my kiddies, so that they could have a little adventure and we rode public transportation.

Here in Miami there isn't much public transportation and not many people use it. It's not as if people choose it as a way of commuting, well obviously some do but not like in most major cities. Here everyone drives.

Today the girlies and I were heading downtown to meet with a jeweller. I need to have some old, Edwardian earrings made into something that I will actually wear and there is only one person in the world that I trust to do the job. Instead of driving, I decided to let the kids take the train. I packed enough Purell to ward off Berry Berry, pnuemonia, the Bubonic Plague and the Clap and we headed out.

We were barely even rolling when the girls encountered life lesson number one: grown men fight.  Oh yes they do and right there on a train and they say all kids of words about their Mothers. In fact Rosie has a whole new vocabulary that I am hoping she won't be sharing with her Kindergarten class on Monday. They say other things to but not as much as they say that thing about their Mothers. Luckily the train driver lady got out of her seat and got all up in their business and threw 2 of them into a different compartment. I thought she was very brave. The girls and I just sat still.

A little later on I was surprised when a man got on with his dog. Since when do dogs ride on trains? It wasn't a service dog, just a pet dog. It made me laugh and the girls thought it was crazy. He didn't stay long.

Things calmed down for a good 3 stops and then they went really batty when the transgender wo/man got on. S/he was enormous and everso African American and covered in tattoos and not very girly or pretty and s/he sounded just like a boy but was wearing a very pretty dress. Lily nearly had to manually reinsert her eyeballs on this one. I purposely failed to point this out to Rosie.

Rosie didn't miss the large man who insisted on standing and leaning against the pole because the pole kept disappearing up his behind,, Yes, yes, I know it's gross but try having a 5 yr old and a 10 yr old with you when this is going down. It's impossible for them not to laugh and laugh loudly. Lily then decided she would not hold on to anything for rear of where it had been! Ditto her sister.

It wasn't long before a man and his bike got on the train. Again, we thought it was odd and the girls giggled. They don't seem to accommodate bikes so the man had to hold it the whole time.

When groups of people get on trains together they appear to be oblivious to all the other people around them and they talk really loud and about a-n-y-t-h-i-n-g in really loud voices. My girls now understand about fencing stolen goods. Yes, so if you need advice, ask Lily she can help with that. Also if you bank won't give you a loan for a car, well I know just what to do.

They also learnt that if a stranger on a train gives you candy your Mum will smile at him, in a kindly fashion, and then whip that candy right out of your hand, nearly breaking all of your fingers and she will toss it in the nearest rubbish bin, without the stranger even noticing. That's just how she rolls. She will then drill you on stranger danger for the next 100 hours.

It was so much fun. Riding the train is hilarious. People watching is the best. I could have done without the fight though. I came home and took a hot shower cos it was really grody.

Downtown wasn't without it's fun either but compared to the train, a piece of cake. I'll share the photos of my jewellry when it's done.


Just starting out and all is well
eewwww, I am not touching ANYTHING
Me either, (ignore the pole)

7 comments:

Headmeister said...

HA! Sounds like a typical day for me for so many years commuting to NYC...lol. I've seen things that make this post seem like a day at Disneyworld...lmao! I'd share one of my fav's, but I don't think it's appropriate to speak of bodily fluids in the comments section of someone's blog...lol. Glad you had a "fun" day! lol!

Luciana said...

Woman, you make me laugh! I totally get it about Miami living. It's so different than anywhere else. With all the craziness you saw, it's good that the girls get to see the 'real life' out there. What if you move to - London, NY... or China?!?!?! :)

Great post. I lol when I read about the girls laughing at the big butt.

James Ethan said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Leah Mei said...

You are hilarious! I have been in Miami for 40 years and have yet to use public transportation. I do recall experiencing something similar in a New York subway train though....

Daisy

Briana's Mom said...

LOL! Wow - a lot of life lessons learned that day!

My dad had to take the Metrorail for a short while to get to work when he lost his company car - and he hated it! And that was 25 years ago! Can't even imagine it today. Yuck.

Nana said...

I CANNOT STOP LAUGHING...I REGULARLY TOOK A AND N FOR METRO RIDES...THEY LOVED TRAINS. WILL TAKE MISS E AT SOME POINT...BUT WILL BE THINKING OF YOUR EXPERIENCE THE ENTIRE TIME. LOVE, NANA

Anonymous said...

Hahahaha, long-time reader of your blog and native Miamian. I always laugh when you post about the metro-rail. I'm an attorney, and when I need to go down to circuit court for a hearing I always take the metrorail, particularly as the Dadeland South station is across the street from my office. It can be quite an experience, that's for sure. The metromover is worse, I think, lol. I always feel like I need to take an hour long warm shower afterwards. Some of the people in my office hate it so much that they'd rather sit in traffic for an hour, lol.

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