Feeling The Love

If yesterdays post seemed a little harsh perhaps this will clarify where I am coming from. If you need a special day in your year to profess your love then I think you have forgotten the plot.

Four years ago my best friend died. Nancy was truly a best friend. Her and I spent many years together and she taught me a lot but more than anything she taught me a lot about the small things in life and taking the time to appreciate them. She always took the time to smile and to say hi....to everyone. We called each other every single morning and fixed the world but one morning when I rang something wasn't right and I asked what was wrong and she said she had a lump in her neck. I told her very matter of factly to go to the DR. She didn't for a while cos she didn't have insurance and was waiting for it to kick in. To make a long story short, it was cancer, stage 4 when it was diagnosed. It was a long and very, very ugly battle. At one point it looked like she had beaten the odds but that joy was was short lived.She had an elderly mother but no other immediate family. Some cousins, one whom I love dearly the other I call the Rottweiler. Her mother was becoming senile so that left Jakey, Nanc' and I to take this on together and we made a hell of a team. We went to all her appointments together, when the chemo and radiation got to much she stayed with us. Jacob, who thought this woman was a nutcase friend of mine when he met her for the first time, did everything for her when I was at work. She fought tooth and nail cos she didn't think she could possibly die. She fought like hell cos she wanted to be Lily's auntie and we wanted it so badly. She was in denial so badly it sucked and made our lives hell. She kept smiling and always said, I love you dolly and that handsome husband of yours.
The hospital staff probably thought we were gay cos I was always laying in her bed with her. I would bathe her and change her when the nurses took to long. I am not sure they could figure out Jacobs role in the equation to begin with so we played it up to confuse them. I was her next of kin and health care proxy. Jacob would visit by himself and get on the bed too. I didn't care I loved this person and so did he.
She lived life to the fullest: pool boys and yardmen got hired for their looks!
In the end we pleaded with her to say goodbye. We had done everything we could. We made sure her mum was taken care of and I had spoken to her nice cousin and we knew it wouldn't be long but I wasn't expecting the phone call that I received. The nursing home called to say her mother had passed away and within the hour while we were at the nursing home the hospital called to say Nancy was gone too. She needed her mum to lead the way. Now that is love!

I miss her, we miss her and Lily never met her. I do not cry for her because the memories are so good. We talk about her all the time and it is always with a smile.

If you have someone so special in your life you are truly, truly lucky, but make sure you tell them how you feel and not just on Valentines day. We always did and I learnt to never miss an opportunity to do so because of Dolly.