It's really amazing when people take an opinion, which is nothing more than a feeling, and allow it to wreck their life. Especially when it had absolutely nothing to do with them in the first place.
My last post about the finals of the swim meet being cancelled has caused so much backlash that I actually closed my blog down, zipped it tighter than a hefty bag. Lost what I thought was a very good friend over it. Got stabbed in the back. Yep, sure did. But then I thought about it, this is my blog and what I said was how I felt. Now if you have read this for a while you know I speak the truth. The good, the bad and the ugly truth. One thing about me is that I am truthful. So I opened it back up again. Actually I had to open it back up cos I need to prove a point and in order to do that then person needs to be able to access it.
So what happened? If you follow me on Facebook you know that I posted that I was displeased when a coach scratched us from finals and I called him an arsehat. If you don't follow me on Facebook it doesn't really matter cos I said the same thing here. Wellllll, someone who follows me on facebook, well used to follow me on Facebook, they unfriended me today, snort, decided that I was just the biggest bitch on the face of the earth for saying that and writing it here on the blog and she forwarded both comments to the Head Coach.
Head Coach then sent me a text asking for my presence on the pool deck. I really wasn't sure what was going on at this point so I called a friend, now ex-friend, her choice.. When she didn't answer her phone or return any texts I knew something was up. Hmmm. I gave the kids a heads up that they just might not be on the team anymore cos Mummio called the Coach a Hat, I don't say Arsehat in front of them, and that we wouldn't be swimming today as I was in a spot of hot water. I spent a few minutes researching other swim teams just in case I had to tell the kids I had screwed them over whilst standing up for Lily.
I walked up to the Head Coach and we talked. Actually he talked A LOT for A LONG time. I finally had my say. I still don't agree with everything he says and he doesn't agree with me. Will I rehash the conversation here? Hell no, not while I believe someone is copying and pasting it to him.
And the comments from all of my friends and family here and on Facebook were just the icing on the cake. So if you choose to be supportive of me and Lily, well please don't. It's unkind apparently.
I leanrt a lot today but more importantly I really did learn that my Father is a truly amazing man. That his wife can send an email, offering her support, at the very second when I am looking at the coach, and that a certain Mum is a dear friend and offered to go under the bus with me. But I don't do that. I don't use names.
Now for the love of all things holy can we please get back to allowing our children to swim FOR FUN. I'm not in this so the girls can go to the Olympics, the thought of that is ridiculous to me, and yes I told the coach that tonight. I don't even expect a college scholarship they are doing it for fun. FUN. Hell I don't even know what the letters, B and BB and A mean after Lilys times mean. I'm not a manic swim mum I couldn't give a flying flip.
Oh and for the person that sent him the link, did you even think to link the posts where I have him up on a pedestal and speak so highly of him? No you didn't did you? Nice!
9 comments:
Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.
Over, under, sideways I'll always ride the bus with you!! <3 and you can throw me from it any time! after all... that's what true friends are for! Not to stab you but to fight with you! xoxoxo
Dawn I only know you through your blog but the one thing that clearly shines through your words is how much you love your kids. Obviously that person was not a true friend! Sounds like grade school behavior...."I'm telling!"
Wow, I cannot believe someone ratted you out! Geesh!
I agree with the "for fun" thing. On Bri's soccer team - I am already beginning to see the moms that are in it for more than fun. It is so sad. Bri is only six years old for goodness sake!
I'm glad you are standing your ground. And I am still supportive of you!
You can say whatever you like. This is your blog. Your opinion. Tough luck if others don't like what you have to say. You never used your coaches name and if he took it personal tough luck than he shouldn't be a coach. If you do go private, I would still like to follow you.
You alrady know how I feel. I support you 1000%. You have a right to your opinion. As for the tattle tale, if she was truly your friend she would have talked to you instead of going behind your back. I have to wonder what her true motives were - maybe getting rid of the competition?
As for the coach, I do not agree with his decision to pull the team because of the weather. No one else did. What message does that send his team? That when the going gets tough you quit? That's not leadership. Neither is pompous behaviour. I have to wonder what his motives are too - and not having to explain himself to you is not very nice. If you are paying for the girls to attend - you deserve an explanation! I think you should find another team where the girls can have fun, and have a better coach regardless of whether they end up in the Olympics or not. Even professional athletes change coaches.
(And maybe it's time to move further north!)
As for our supportive comments being unkind - BS. Maybe the people saying that should look at their own behaviour before pointing fingers. I think stabbing a friend in the back and being a tattle tale is more than unkind.
Next time, just call them an arsehat to their face.
What a shame. I am so sorry you have to go through this. When I first read your post the other day I was so sad for Lily. The coach made a bad choice, im my opinion. You have every right to speak your mind and take up for your girls.
I don't understand the drama that some people need to thrive on these days. Some just love to stir the pot. It's sad. I'm sorry you lost an aquaintance (can't really call her a friend).
Unfortunately, I think we live in a very "ME" society nowadays and it is making a difference every where, even in team sports. I see it at school where I work, the teams here, and I am sure it will be around when Zac starts sports. :(
I have said for a long time that I want to be a mom just like you some day. The passion you have for your girls is easily seen through your actions and words. What ever you choose to do, stay with the current team or move to a new team, I love following along. I enjoy seeing the amazing progress the girls are making.
Whew! This sure turned into a ramble comment. I hope it makes a little sense. I hope ~ bottom-line ~ to let you know that even though I may not comment, I am here to support you!!!
It has taken me many years to realize that some people just like to cause trouble. They must lead really dull lives in order to find even the time for gossip. That's really what it is. GOSSIP! As far as losing a friend, you didn't. That wasn't a real friend.
Oops should have caught up fully before commenting on the last post. Sounds as if I'm supporting you now, don't tell anyone!!!
Wow! What a silly thing to do. Going to the coach behind your back? Not taking your calls or texts? Uh. So long. Buh. Bye.
Truly I couldn't have said it any better than Viv did. She's quite eloquent with her words. Me? Id rather be a beeahtch & snark on the person who betrayed you.
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